Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Not always proud of myself...

Ophelia by ~Inspiration-Addict
Don't fall for me cuz It'll take you 6 feet under
aesthetic, apocalypse, and radioactive image
Why can't I escape?
I told you guys that I would be open about my good and bad days... So here we go....

I am in a downward-spiraling world of confusion. I need help but I'm scared. I don't know how to forgive myself, but then again I don't know what I should be forgiving myself for. I feel so scared. I went back to some bad habits yesterday that I'M NOT proud of. Maybe I'm waiting to receive forgiveness from others... Who? I'm not quite sure. I cut myself last night. I was hoping that it would numb the pain... It didn't. I was hoping that maybe the physical pain would hurt enough that I could forgive myself... I haven't. I don't know what to do, or how to live, or anything along those lines anymore. I even took in a new habit of cutting my arms. Once again... Not at all proud.


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*Back before demons took control of my heart*~ James Arthur

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